Proper Wording In Wedding Invitations
Let's Start Off With: When Do I Send Out My Wedding Invitations?
Traditionally, wedding invitations go out around six to eight weeks before the wedding. If it’s a destination wedding, then more on the eight week mark.
Wording For The Invitations (Disclaimer: Subject To Change Based on a Wedding to Wedding Basis)
I receive a lot of questions on wording on invitations, especially if the parents are divorced. My specialty is planning but based on past experience and research, here are a few tips and tricks I have learned along the way.
Divorced Parents Wording For Wedding Invitations:
This can be a sensitive subject, so I do recommend speaking with the parents before moving forward with the writing without their input. Although it is your wedding, it’s always best to keep the peace and ask instead of assume.
Four Rules Of Thumb:
- Talk To Both Parents About How They Feel The Wording Should Be
- Don’t have the divorced parents on the same line (even if they both remain unmarried) and list them on separate lines without an “and” between them
- Traditionally, it’s usually the parents name that appears on the invitation but you can include stepparents (of course you can do whatever you want, it’s your wedding, but this is according to tradition)
- Lastly, the mother’s name usually goes first but as of recently, I have been seeing the father name goes first because he is contributing financially, but traditional it’s mothers name first and if she is not remarried then you use “Ms.” Followed by her first name and the last name she is currently using
- Based on preference, it can be “honor” or “honour” – I am using “honor” since that’s what Microsoft word prefers but the formal tradition is “honour” as according to traditional British spelling.
- Do Not Use Abbreviations UNLESS it is Mr., Mrs., and Ms. – this does not include “Dr.” so Doctor it is
- “Request The Honour Of Your Presence” Is Used If The Ceremony Is Taking Place In A House of Worship otherwise it’s “pleasure of your company”
- Only Use Bride’s First And Middle Name unless Bride’s last name is different than parents or if the parents are divorced
- Jewish Faith Replaces the “And” to a “to”
Lastly, When & Where
Typically Looks Like This (Disclaimer: This is really based on design and totally up to you!)
On Saturday, the thirteenth of February
Two Thousand and Twelve
At Half After Five O’Clock
Wedding Venue
Address of Wedding Venue
State, City of Wedding Venue
*Dinner and Dancing To Follow (if in same venue)
If your ceremony is separate from reception:
On Saturday, The Thirteenth Of February
Two Thousand And Twelve
At Half After Five O’clock
Wedding Ceremony Location
City, State
And Reception To Follow in
Reception Venue
City, State
(or you can incorporate a reception card if it’s too much for the invitation)
Few More Rules Of Thumb:
- Do not use abbreviations, including a.m or p.m.
- You do not have to clarify afternoon or evening unless the wedding is at 8,9, or 10 o’clock
- Hyphen Numbers for example, 27 would be twenty-seventh
- Spell out numbers except in the address
- Spell out the year as well as the state
- Use “Half After” Instead of “past” for the time
- Zip codes are not included usually
MOST IMPORTANTLY: Keep calm, Try And Keep The Peace, Pick Your Battles, AND Enjoy!!!! This can be a potentially very stressful topic for the family but remember in the end, they all love you and this is just an obstacle in the road to an amazing wedding! You got this!!
Examples:
Traditional In A Religious Wedding:
Mr. And Mrs. *Fathers First Name and Last Name
Request The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of Their Daughter
*Bride’s First And Middle Name
To
*Groom’s Full Name
Both Parents Host In A Religious Wedding
Mr. And Mrs. *Bride’s Father’s First Name and Last Name
And
Mr. And Mrs. *Groom’s Father’s First Name And Last Name
Request The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of
**Bride’s First And Middle Name
To
*Groom’s Full Name
Bride’s Parents Are Hosting a Non-Religious Wedding:
Mr. And Mrs. *Fathers First Name and Last Name
Request The Pleasure Of Your Company
At The Marriage Of Their Daughter
**Bride’s First And Middle Name
To
*Groom’s Full Name
BUT! The Most Common Way To Address The Invitation is to Involve BOTH set of parents, despite who is providing the financials (again, up to your preference)
Both Parents Addressing For Wedding
Mr. And Mrs. *Father’s First Name and Last Name
Request The Pleasure Of Your Company
At The Marriage Of Their Daughter
**Bride’s First And Middle Name
To
*Groom’s Full Name
Both Parents Addressing After Divorce (not remarried) For Wedding
M( r )s. *Bride’s Mothers Full Name
*Bride’s Father Full Name
Request The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of Their Daughter
**Bride’s First And Middle Name
To
*Groom’s Full Name
Invitation With Mother Who Is Not Remarried
Mother’s Name
Requests The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of Her Daughter
*Bride’s Name
To
*Groom’s Name
Invitation With Father Who Is Not Remarried
Father’s Name
Requests The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of His Daughter
Bride’s Name
To
Groom’s Name
Invitation With Mother + Stepfather:
Mother & Stepfather’s Names
Request The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of Her (or their) (or mother’s name) Daughter
Bride’s Name
To
Groom’s Name
Invitation With Father + Stepmother:
Father and Stepmother’s Names
Request The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of His (or their) (or father’s name) daughter
Bride’s Name
To
Groom’s Name
Both Parents Addressing After Divorce (not remarried) For Wedding
*You would include the mother and step-father first then the father and step-mother second
Including The Groom’s Divorced Parents On The Invite, And The Father Is Remarried But The Mother Is Not (But Still Has Her Married Name):
M( r )s. *Bride’s Mom’s Name
Mr. *Bride’s Dad’s Name
Request The Honor Of Your Presence
At The Marriage Of Their Daughter
*Bride’s Name
to
*Groom’s Name
Son of *Groom’s Mom’s Full Name
Mr. And Mrs. Groom’s Remarried Dad Full Name
